I GO! Edition #46 – Joy As A Life Strategy

"You were obsessed with something as a child for a reason. It was an early manifestation of your deep inclinations, a clue to your destiny. In your early years, this passion was unfiltered and pure. To find your life's work, you must look backward to uncover what you naturally gravitated toward before the world told you what to do." Robert Greene

London late May is a city in bloom - flirting with itself, flashing its pale limbs beneath a slightly unbuttoned floral dress, laughing out loud, head thrown back in abandon. The lilac hue of the wisteria covering the white stucco houses of West London has disappeared, and the roses that came in fast, bursting, through the wrought-iron gates or above porches – they’ve started to fade. Terraces fill again. Parks become open-air living rooms, grassy salons for lovers and friends, sometimes both, sitting cross-legged on the grass sharing sparkling wine and gutted packets of salt and vinegar crisps. The city finally exhales. It loosens that tie, takes off that grey jacket, unbuttons the shirt, rolls up its sleeves to expose tight forearms. Leans back, legs ajar – big sigh. And in this heavy summer before it’s even summer heat, for a few fleeting weeks, London - my home, my love - becomes impossibly laid-back, nonchalant, languorous. Long evenings, chilled wine, last-minute invitations, and the euphoria of heat and sunlight after a winter crossing of sheer dullness. And London, at its best, is exactly that: a sexy, magnificent, imperfect and slightly repressed negotiation between realities. A conscious stream of sensuousness of a city losing itself in the heat.

But I am digressing. Sorry. This is not what I wanted to tell you about. This week, I was recording a podcast about freelance life. And at one point, my interviewer asked me a question many people are asking themselves right now: How do you thrive - or even survive - in a world of constant change - AI, geopolitical uncertainty, economic volatility and constant disruption? What advice would I give solo entrepreneurs, freelancers and guerrilla professionals trying to navigate the future?

And I had a moment of reckoning. And loved that question.

There are many sensible answers to future-proofness and succeeding as lone operator (Adapt continuously. Educate yourself. Learn AI. Build your network. Develop your personal brand. Embrace technology. Become antifragile. Understand the zeitgeist, and address it, blablablah…)

But those are just tactics - they are meaningless on their own. If you want to “succeed” in life – and by that, I mean live a fulfilling life, of passion and purpose, of strong connection to all and “the All”, and most of all, to yourself, you have to start it with:

JOY

Most people build their lives backwards. They expect Joy at the end of it, not at the start.

When I earn enough money…When I get promoted…When I retire…When I find someone who loves me…

But life is now of course. And it’s now you need to feel alive, inspired, excited.

Joy is the source of everything.

The source of energy. Of curiosity. Of resilience. Creativity. The source of a life worth living.

A few years ago, during a period of career reflection, inflection, even, I took a blank sheet of paper and wrote one word in the middle (and I continue to do it regularly, to always to revert back to this intention):

JOY

Then I drew a circle around it and started mind-mapping everything that brought me alive.

Travel.

Writing.

Reading.

Words.

Music.

Nature.

Architecture.

The Arts

Gastronomy.

Beauty.

Discovery.

Expressing myself.

Loving.

Drinking fine wine with friends, children playing in the background.

Being on stage discussing big and important ideas with brilliant people.

The thrill of seeing and understanding something new.

The list became long…

Most people get it wrong: Joy is not a reward. It is the fuel. The life force that will propel you forward. The things that bring you joy are not distractions from your purpose, but clues to it. Not from me: from the great Carl Jung.

Jung believed that our lifetime task is individuation: becoming more fully ourselves. Seen through that lens, joy is a guide. The things that repeatedly fascinate us, draw us in, energise us and make us lose track of time, are clues given by the psyche itself. They reveal something fundamental about our nature. Jung associated this life-giving force with the anima - the realm of imagination, creativity, eros, beauty, intuition and wonder.

Joy, in this context, is more than a pleasant emotion. It is a compass pointing towards the person we are trying to become, and towards a life that feels deeply and unshakeably our own.

Joy is curiosity

Joy may also be an instinct we have learnt to repress, to tone down, bizarrely. It is linked to what neuroscientists call the seeking system. Neuroscientist Jaak Panksepp argued that one of the primary emotional systems in mammals is SEEKING: the drive to explore, discover, investigate, learn and engage with the world. This system is heavily mediated by dopamine, but contrary to popular belief dopamine is not the “pleasure chemical.” It is more accurately the neurotransmitter of motivation, anticipation, curiosity and pursuit.

Joy is also intrinsically connected to your Mastery. In fact, your mastery often comes from what gives you joy. Because you throw yourself in a pursuit you love, the time allocated to hone that skill becomes irrelevant, when to others, it might be pain.

If you struggle to identify what brings you joy today, and your unique craft, what makes you different, your superpower, go back to your childhood.

Before status, expectations, ego started to corrupt your authentic self, what would plunge you into a state of flow? What could you spend hours doing without noticing time passing?

For me it was talking, reading, writing, entertaining. And my professional life is simply a more sophisticated version, an extension of those childhood joys. To the extent, work doesn’t feel like work anymore: I do what I am = I am what I do. (I love what I do = I do what I love. And when I am what I love = I love what I am…)

Therefore Joy is not frivolous, it is strategic. The best way to accomplish yourself. It generates energy = energy generates action = action generates opportunities = opportunities generate outcomes.

And outcomes translates into …income. Devastatingly simple.

Joy can survive disappointment, setbacks, even grief. Joy does not depend entirely on what “happens” to us. It comes from our relationship with life itself.

Joy is the source, the objective, the fuel, the process and the destination.

Start with YOU. Start with joy.

Charlotte